Friday, May 20, 2011

Holy Christ, the rapture!

Let me start out by saying that while I believe in God, I despise organized religion. Belief is great. Religion is about controlling people.

Having said that, I think that if you are going to follow a religion, perhaps you should be aware of the basic tenets of your faith. I know, I'm wasting my breath. Christians are one of the most bigoted groups in the world, and they also tend to not believe even their own faith. God is all powerful. Yet they fear Satan may take over. Well, which is it? You either believe God is all powerful, in which case nobody is taking over because ALL POWERFUL means that if Satan looks at him crosseyed ZAP! God snaps his fingers and Satan disappears in a poof of sulfuric ash, or you don't believe it and pray every night that the boogie man won't get you.

Anyway, if you believe in Christianity, God, and the bible, how in the everloving fuck can you believe the world is going to end tomorrow based on same crazy-ass radio DJ's prediction? Let's go to the bible and check it out:
Matthew 24:36 (whichever version you have, it translates to roughly) But of that day and hour knows no man, no, not the angels of heaven, but my Father only.

OK, so crazy religious nuts, here's your checklist:

1: Is this radio DJ God? - No.
2: Is this radio DJ a man? - Yes.
3: Is he some crazy ass dipshit flying Wacky Motherfucker Airlines? You betcha.

He's not God, he is a man, and he is crazy. Since only the Father (God) knows when the return is, I guess it isn't happening tomorrow.

So there you have it. The only people that are going to meet God tomorrow are the loony-tunes that show up on my front porch claiming the rapture is happening, or the ones that follow claiming the rapture passed them over and so they're going to loot my house. Those people are going to earn themselves a face-full of 00 buckshot, for Jesus!

Tuesday, May 17, 2011


To start with, I really, really need to never open my mouth and say I don't want to buy something, because every time I do that (Playstation 3, my Jeep, etc...) I end up buying whatever I said I didn't want to buy. I said that I didn't want to buy Rift because I beta tested the game, and it really felt just like World of Warcraft with better graphics. I was playing World of Warcraft with my friends, so paying to play another game just like it seemed silly.

And then Alienware started a contest to win a new laptop by trying the 7 day Rift trial and leveling a character past level 5. I entered the contest and wound up at the level limit of the trial (15). Then I ran out the next day and bought the collectors edition.

You see, Rift is not really just like WoW. It's close enough to feel comfortable, but it adds elements from Everquest 2, Warhammer Online, Lord of the Rings Online, and dozens of other past MMOs. So it feels like an old flame dressed in a hot new outfit. You already know what she is like in a relationship, but damned if you don't have a couple of drinks and wind up in the sack with her anyway.

I've also made the self discovery that I don't like the endgame of most MMOs. I love leveling up and discovering the story and exploring the new areas as they come, but once I hit the level cap and work through most of the content, I don't want to keep doing it over and over forever just to get new gear. I wind up leaving until an expansion or sequel comes out. I've done it with WoW every time I finish an expansion, and I've done it with a bunch of other games. I left WoW recently because I think Blizzard made a mistake and this newest expansion was too short. I finished it, did all of the dungeons a few times, and even raided a bit. Then I burned out. I'm sure Rift is headed to the same fate, but... Oh well. I'll enjoy the ride until then!